SISter School™️: A Lesson in Confronting the Fear of Success

From empty nest to personal. Best, let's fly, mum, fly. Hi mums. It's Bobby, with another mini-episode from the Sister School blog within the Inspired Empty Nest site. Today's lesson is in confronting the fear of success. I'm wondering have you ever had anxiety right on the edge of doing something you think is awesome? Well, I did. Last week I had just launched the new Empty Nest Mums Directory. It had been a really big week. While I was creating it I had the most amazing feeling bubbling inside my heart. I was beyond excited to be on the verge of giving women in this phase of life the chance to connect with mums nearby. But after I'd clicked publish, I found myself in a situation that might be familiar to others. It felt like the fear of failing, but deep down, after doing some self-inventory, it was more like a fear of succeeding. Now, that's a bit of a paradox, I know, and it can really mess with your head. Trust me, as humans we're creatures of habit. We cozy up in our comfort zones where everything is familiar and safe and nothing's too challenging. But when I stepped out of that cocoon and made this directory live for all to see the whole uncertainty and change thing felt so intimidating. That's when the fear of first failure. Then the fear of success started to rear its head. People often talk of imposter syndrome and I'm not immune to it. It's that nagging voice in your head asking you who are you to do something like this, and do I really belong in this space? Will they think it's not as good as I believe it to be? That self-doubt really hit me. Then I realized, in the mix was fear of responsibility. Success often comes with more stuff on your plate, more work, more attention and those pesky higher expectations of self. The added pressure started to weigh on my mind. I worried about how to maintain the interest that might come with this directory, meet self-imposed standards and handle new roles. It's like a roadblock on the path to success. Then there was a fear of being seen, because when something succeeds you tend to find yourself in the spotlight, right, whether it's nailing a personal goal, getting a promotion at work or getting recognized in your field. Success can shine a light on you and that extra attention can stir up feelings of vulnerability and self-consciousness. Suddenly you're thinking about what people might say or think about you, and that just adds more fuel to the whole fear of success fire. But here's the thing I texted an amazing friend of mine who knows me well and always has something great to offer. She asked me the right questions which allowed me to recognize these feelings, confront them and continue the journey. And you know what? It's okay to feel this way, because recognizing and dealing with the fear of success is the key to achieving your goals. So, on her advice, I stepped back for a little while, I left the concerns behind and I did something nice for myself. Thank you, my friend. Until next time.