Essential Oils and New Beginnings: Beccy's Transformation

Bobbi: 0:30

Hello and a warm welcome to this episode of Fly Mom Fly. I'm your Bobbi Chegwyn, and today I am so happy to have Beccy Freeman on with me Now. Beccy is from Breathe and Blossom in Australia and she's a mom, a wellness health coach, a counselor and a candle maker. She's really passionate about empowering women with natural, low-toxic wellness options, which I think is so important, and guiding them to make informed decisions for their health. She believes in self-nurturing, recognizing that by filling your own cup, you can serve others better. Becky, hello, and I should say good morning, because it's 7am in Victoria in Australia.

Beccy: 1:18

It absolutely is, and good morning to you.

Bobbi: 1:20

I am so, so happy to be here yes, we should just probably share this that Becky and I actually did this. Maybe was it two or three months ago. We had the best talk. It just was authentic, it just went with the flow. We didn't because I don't script anything. We had this wonderful chat about wellness and there were so many aha moments for me listening to what you do. And then something happened with the recording and we only got six minutes of it. So we waited until today and now Becky is back, so she's so good to get up at whatever the crack of dawn in Australia and jog the day, because self-care is really something that I think I would be surprised if we don't think about it every so often, if not every day, in this phase of life, now that we're empty nest mums. One thing I know from my point of view, that it's not habitual for me to put myself first in looking after my physical body, emotions and mental. I'll go for, but I sort of disregard the physical stuff because I think it maybe takes a little bit more time and effort. So I love that you have so much great information to share. Tell us about your emptiness situation. Who do you no longer have at home?

Beccy: 2:50

All right. So I am a mum to three boys and so after so what? So my experience really of being that a true empty nest I was, when I was my youngest, slept home, and that happened sort of about 15 or 16 months after a whole major life transformation for me, which was the breakdown of my very long long marriage, and so this change all kind of came about quite quickly and was a huge and positive transition in my life. So suddenly here I am, and it's just my youngest son and I, and we are starting a whole new life together, and it was just the most miraculously liberating time for me. Not to say that there wasn't some grief of endings, but it was still a time where I really you know that last year that we had together while he was studying his final year of high school was just the most fun time. And but ultimately our Bobby I knew that he had made no secret about the fact, because I live with even a very small rural town here in North East Victoria, and there was no, there was never any hint that he was going to even stick around to get his year 12 results. Like he was gone. He couldn't wait to leave, he really couldn't to go down to experience, you know, the big smoke or life in that Melbourne at just as his older brother's had done. And and so I took that time in that last year not only to be fully present with my youngest and have all those create those wonderful memories of just him and I, which was a really, really special time. But I was always very conscious that he was going. There was no two ways about that, and so I really, you know, really reflected on how that was going to impact me and what I was going to do.

Bobbi: 5:04

So you mentioned that you had this big awakening. I guess this feeling of liberation and and the level of excitement and I do get that, because obviously going through a divorce is never going to be rainbows and butterflies and all things nice it can be so challenging. However, you did have a sense that there was opportunity within the crisis that you were going through. Had you always known at some stage of your life you would venture into something that made you feel this way? Or was that the catalyst that pushed you even into initially thinking about it?

Beccy: 5:44

That was the catalyst that pushed me into even thinking about it. And never you know, when you eat, when you're down there in the trenches and you've got young, young children or teenagers, you know, I think that, yeah, the thought of what, what comes next, doesn't change to occur, or it didn't for me anyway.

Bobbi: 6:03

Yeah, yeah, I know, with some empty nesting and I write about this in the post-nest plan that I never really stopped in the busyness of day to day life and the stress that can come with being a mum and I was a single mum for five years, it was the thoughts often went to ah, imagine the freedom you're going to have when the kids have grown up and and they've moved out, and it was kind of like this fantasy that I had of how it would be like and I never stopped to consider oh my God, now I'm starting to laugh like a lunatic I never stopped to consider what would actually happen. So I know from reading your website, breatheandblossomcomau, that you grew up with parents who were very much into the natural environment. So tell us about how you started your business and and I guess your why behind it. What was it calling to you to?

Beccy: 7:12

do. Okay, I love this question because, yes, my parents were very much, you know, back in the you know back in the sort of seventies very hippie, and we moved to growing up in quite a sort of conservative town. So mum and dad were very much the old ones out. We were on some a little tiny package of land where we found organically, and so for that, for that township, for that township and and community, we were definitely oddities, which I think is that it's so special now because they grew to be very, very beloved in the community and it was always a bit of a running joke, you know, the hippies. So that was, yeah, that was, that was very special in terms of how my journey started. It was very much so during that time, before my youngest lifetime, I had rediscovered my connection and passion for essential oils and so, and so I had, you know, just throwing myself wholehearted, like you know, it felt very right for me that this was my special thing, this was, this was what was going to help and support me get through the inevitable grief when my youngest left home. So I latched on to those essential oils and I just, you know, I just used them. I learned about them, all of the wondrous goodness that that are essential oils for your mental health, your physical health. All of you know you're cleaning all of all of that kind of stuff every, every way that you could use essential oils in your life I learned about and I practiced, and so that's who really breathe and blossom was born out of that. My desire to share the goodness of the essential oils with you know, with a wider, with a wider audience, with a wider community, and to really just support women generally, who are looking for alternatives that are low talks, and to incorporate these essential oils into their life, into their homes and their family lives. And yes, I really, really wanted to educate them. And so breathe and blossom was then born, bobby, from my desire to get a little bit creative with essential oils, and so I created essential oil candles, and the reason I just because I love. You know, a lot of people love candles, but the candles that you buy in the store, I generally loaded with what they call fragrance. Now, fragrance is obviously what makes them smell so delicious. However, it is also a chock-full of synthetic, man-made chemicals.

Bobbi: 10:08

It's so interesting because I thought, if it says all natural and it says all natural fragrance, I kind of think, okay, well then there's nothing here that's going to harm us. But the idea of low tox is obviously one of your values. How do fragrances, how can they mess with our bodies, especially as women who are, I'm guessing, the audience, around 40, 45 plus? How can fragrances mess with our bodies and maybe minds and maybe emotions at this stage of life?

Beccy: 10:46

Yeah, well, probably the biggest one that we need to understand and really know is the hormone disrupting chemicals that are in fragrances and so that messes like we're already vulnerable because we're in that really perimenopause phase of our lives, so our hormones are already in a bit of free fall. They are doing weird, weird, wonderful things. I don't know about the wonderful, but definitely the weird thing and the know-it-all. We use all of these, like you know. I know that there's women. We apply about 100 different chemicals in terms of all of that personal care routine. The end of the day, a woman will have over 100 chemicals on her body if she's not aware. Now, that's frightening when you think about the endocrine disrupting qualities of these chemicals, not to mention the cathetogenic nature of a lot of the chemicals. And, of course, you know all of the breathing, the physical, like the it can irritate airways, all of that kind of stuff. Like they're serious, like this, and this is the thing all natural fragrance. You know that labels are not regulated and neither is like, and again, fragrance is a blanket term for hundreds of chemicals and manufacturers simply list that ingredient as a single ingredient which says fragrance, because it's classified as what they call a trade secret, so they don't want to tell you what's in it, so that no one else can steal their ideas. They want to know how they get away with not disclosing each and every chemical that is in that fragrance.

Bobbi: 12:31

It's pretty shocking because, as I mentioned off here before we started recording, I'm doing a 21 day sugar detox at the moment and I'm really loving it. I must say there are changes on so many different levels, not just physical. I think I'm going through some sort of emotional, mental and spiritual journey at the same time, because I do think it does work on all levels. But getting back to what you're saying about the labels, it is so important. I've been in the grocery store and I've been picking up things and anything that has any added sugars. Obviously I'm putting back, but it's so interesting to see where the sugar is hidden. And among all the preservatives, additives, colour, over here they have high fructose corn syrup. So it's just all this stuff that is shoved in. And when I saw there's a lady called Skydale who's running this program and she I was there's a weekly call, group call and she was saying how important it is to shop the perimeter of the supermarket because in the middle and it's the analogy we can use it, similar to the fragrances You'd have all your essential oils and the like all around the outside and then you'd have the majority of what's there is processed crap that doesn't raw harm than good. So how do you use things? Oils?

Beccy: 14:03

I'd use them in just a multitude of ways that you could. The number one is I have diffusers throughout the house which you drop a few and that's basically that you know. I think most people are familiar with the water, cold air diffusers. So that doesn't work. So a lot of people. Once upon a time people used to have hot, hot oil burners, but in that sometimes the natures of the essence of the oil can, in some oils can actually be broken down by heat. So it's always better to go with your steam diffuser, which is cop like, yeah, it's basically cold. So diffusers is the number one. Before I came on just to settle myself and ground myself and make sure I was all prepared, and then the best space possible, I actually dropped some frankincense lavender and a blend called adaptive, which is like an anti-anxiety blend, a calming blend, into the palm of my hands. I rub them together and then it takes some really big sniffs like no one can see me, I don't think but big sniffs from my hands. So that's cool, we call that, we call that cup and smell. So you put it in the palm of your hand, rub it together and then have some really big, deep breaths. So that's, that's a really great, great way to get them into your space, you know, immediately. But you can also use them like instead of say, for example, instead of having a nasty, chemical smelly thing in the toilet, I just drop a few essential oils on the inside of the toilet roll and then my bathrooms. My bathroom smells beautifully fresh. But they're like life of that toilet roll. You can drop them on. You know cotton pads or anything like that to have a round in rooms. You can drop them, have a little china dish and you're fridge with some lemon essential oil, so your fridge smells beautiful and fresh. So there's, yeah, a lot of different ways.

Bobbi: 16:06

You ever do this? I've heard of it and I did try it way back when we were in Sydney. Someone said put oils onto cotton balls and stick them in your vacuum and then, when the air's blowing, it's sucking, and then blowing out air, it actually makes your home environment smell really lovely.

Beccy: 16:27

I do that with the filter. The filter in my vacuum, so I put drops on the filter.

Bobbi: 16:34

Let's just take one thing anxiety. A lot of us suffer from anxiety. So you did mention a few oils and from my understanding there are oils that suit different needs, but let's just take. If someone told you and said, Becky, I have anxiety, whether it's chronic or not, but it's actually detrimental to my life experience at the moment, what would you recommend? And is there a brand that is better than the other? And what should we be looking? Sorry, I've got a million questions for you. What should we be on the labeling? So we understand that they are all natural essential oils. So if you can share what someone with anxiety would be wanting to do, All right.

Beccy: 17:41

So there's a few questions there. The first thing, in terms of what brand, I personally use doTERRA, and I use doTERRA and recommend doTERRA because I know of the stringent testing and quality control that doTERRA have and put each bottle of their oils and each batch through. So each batch, or sorry, each bottle, of essential oils in doTERRA has a batch number and, if you wanted to I've never done this I trust that this is the case, that you can actually put that little number in and find out all of its details. So they're very, very, they're very, very stringent and transparent in terms of what testing they do with their oils, and for me, that sits right. I'm not going to say that other, you know that's just what I choose and I believe and I recommend. So then, so that's that question. In terms of labeling of essential oils, the things that you need to be really mindful of is that it's only got essential oils, so the label should have here's a lavender I've got here, so the label should have its common name, so lavender, and then it should have its botanical name, which is lavender august folia, and then it should, and that's all it should have. And you look at ingredients, that is all it will have. So if the if you have a bottle of what you believe is essential oil and it lists anything other than that oil, then you've probably picked up a blend which has been adulterated with, like basically diluted. So if anything says essential oils and fragrance you know and fragrance then you put it back quickly.

Bobbi: 19:42

The name like lavender, and what lavender's botanical name is that? They're the only two things that would be on that bottle and you don't want it to be mixed with anything else. Okay, and if someone had anxiety, what would you recommend?

Beccy: 19:58

Lavender. Lavender's a great, it's a, it's an all-rounder, and you know you would mix this with something like I mean, and that's the other thing, you can actually pre purchase blends that are Designed to support so you can get it like a calming blend which would have, say, lavender, it would have something woody, which is a grounding, and yeah, so oils like that. Frankincense is a beautiful one, and so if we say that lavender is like the queen of oils, I would say frankincense is the king, because what's so magic about frankincense? And so I love this fact. So so much is that frankincense actually amplifies and what's the compliments, and so any therapeutic benefit that a particular essential oil might have, depending on what you're using. But for let's go with lavender for the sake of anxiety and calming, because it calms down, sleep it's great, sleep as well. So what the Frank? If you're adding in the frankincense, bobby, it actually Elevates those therapeutic and amplifies their therapeutic qualities. So frankincense is Amazing.

Bobbi: 21:15

What I'd like to talk about briefly is that last time we were chatting, you made reference to a term that I had never heard of before and at the time, I am Glad to say, sleeping a little bit better now, but I really think it's got to do with detoxing my physical body. However, I could do with some extra Help along those lines, because sometimes I still do wake up and I think just preparing my room would be fantastic. So last time you talked about the term, or you use the term, sleep hygiene. So if you can just let our listeners know what that is all about, because it was new to me, okay so sleep hygiene, basically, I love talking about this.

Beccy: 22:03

So basically it is about having good sleep practices, so being very aware and being very conscious of the things that you are doing leading up to when you expect your body to go to sleep. So you need to have a bit of a nurturing sequence along the way. So that might include things like dimming lights down an hour, an hour and a half before bedtime. It would, for me of it would include going and switching my diffuser on my bedside on, and so in that diffuser I particularly like lavender, it a lot of our particularly like bed of our, the Roman chamomile these are all really good oils to support sleep. You know you would then make conscious choice, but I think you'd know about blue light like it and the harmful impacts blue light has on your melatonin Generation, which is basically the hormone or chemical that your body releases when it's time for sleep, and so blue light will impact that negatively. So it's about being really conscious of reducing your exposure to blue lights. A turning off screen time and maybe Picking up a book, all this thing, just some calming music or something like that. So those are the things that Good sleep hygiene practices and which. So it's about being really finding out what works for you, because everyone a little bit different. The things that I've talked about are what I do, but everyone, you know everyone needs to find a practice. And the thing is, bobby, once you do that, and you start Very consciously doing those one, two, three, four steps before bed every night, then you're telling you all a subconscious oh, we're winding down for the day, we're getting ready for sleep.

Bobbi: 23:54

One thing I'm curious about is temperature. Is there a better temperature colder- definitely. Okay, I win. My husband wants it much warmer. I need the icon to be 68 degrees, which is someone? Please work that out to be Celsius. I think maybe it's about 2018, I don't know.

Beccy: 24:14

I know that optimal temperature is 18 to 20.

Bobbi: 24:18

Okay, okay. So I'll double check that after After we finish today. But I love it really. Super cold and in fact In the middle of winter, here like it can be January, and here in Ohio at nighttime, it's not Strange for it to get down to like minus 10 or something at night. But I'll crack the window because I just love the idea of crisp cold air and to be cold I, but underneath a blanket that's going to keep me warm enough for my poor husband and he radiates heat. I don't know, that thing with guys is totally weird. And one of my dogs does it like he's a radiator and he wants to spoon and it's like no, because also I'm meant to pull. It's like go away. I sometimes even want to kick the sheets off. Then it's the window open. Paul Guy is wearing a tracking to the bed, top and pants and he's shivering, but God loving me puts up with me. But, yeah, okay. So for anyone who comes to my house, he's got the thermostat down so low, which they often do. Comment. This is the reason why I'm preparing myself for a hygienic sleep. So just to wrap up, today, becky, you have a business in Australia, so you make your own candles. I know you coach women and have workshops as well, for instance, candle making workshops and I was on your site before and I thought, oh, I wish you know if I was in Victoria I would come along to one, because I think there would be nothing better than making your own safe, non-toxic candle. That's just going to smell absolutely beautiful. So if you can just share with our listeners what you do while for your business, in case they would like to be contacting you, yeah absolutely so.

Beccy: 26:11

In my business I do offer the essential oil candles and, just on that note, in terms of if you were here, you would I'm thinking about potentially doing some zoom classes, but I would need to partner with someone, say where you are, to make sure that you are able to source all of the raw ingredients from a reputable yeah. Yeah, so that's definitely an idea that I've got for at some point in the future, but for the moment, so I have my essential oil candles. I have a counselling practice that just support people who are navigating some transitions or change, or stress or symptoms of anxiety or depression, so all of the things that you might go and see a therapist or a counsellor for. And then I also have my women's health coaching package, which is a wonder, one bespoke coaching experience that runs for 90 days where I support women going through that transition into the second half of their lives and we use, you know so really looking at the wellness, so you know, all of their experience any kind of perimenopausal, menopausal symptoms or just stress it. That way we're looking at their wellness to start with, and then we're looking at the mindset and so all of the stories that they might be telling themselves or have absorbed from our society about what being in the second half of their lives actually means for you and I'm picking some of the negativity around that and really flipping the script on that and, you know, supporting women to see that this is a warrior's time. It's a time to be celebrated and at the time where we can really deeply, deeply think into the truth of who we are in an authentic way.

Bobbi: 28:06

Well, I just want to thank you so much for jumping on today and I'm so glad we got to do this again. The three cheers for us that we got this episode together, and I want to thank you so much, and I do encourage anyone who's listening to go and visit Becky's website. First things first, it's just a beautifully done website and she has lovely things, and it's really important at this stage in life, I think, to come to understand what is toxic in our lives, whether it's food or our own negative self-talk, or its fragrances or cleaning products, or anything that we are doing or using that is detrimental to our own well-being. When we are detrimental to our own well-being, it prevents us from reaching that level of joy which is our rightful state in life and which we all have the opportunity to reach. So, thank you so much. All the very best. I'm sure we will be speaking again soon, becky.

Beccy: 29:06

Thank you very much for the opportunity to have this, have this chat.

Bobbi: 29:10

I've loved every minute of it always no worries. Well to all our listeners and viewers. Thank you so much. It's been great having you here and we'll connect with you next time on Fly, Mum Fly.