Day 11: Supportive Parenting

Bobbi Chegwyn: 0:34

Welcome to day 11 of 21 Days Together. Today, we're going to look at the challenge of letting go. As children transition into adulthood, it's essential for parents to adapt to the changing dynamics in their relationship. The roles and responsibilities once defined by the child's dependence on their parents involves into more independent and equal connections. However, some parents find it challenging to relinquish their traditional roles as mum or dad and struggle to adapt to their child's new found autonomy. This unwillingness to let go can lead to discord within the family and impede the healthy development of both parents and children. Today, we'll explore how discord can arise when parents hold on too tightly to their role as mum, as it was defined during their children's formative years, and discuss the importance of embracing evolving relationship roles Now, during the early years of parenting. As we know, our children rely heavily on us for guidance, support and care. However, as they grow older and more self-sufficient, they naturally seek more autonomy in their lives. This process is a natural part of human development, allowing young adults to gain confidence, learn from their own experiences and carve out their identities. However, some parents find it challenging to adjust to their children's new found independence. They may resist accepting that their child is no longer solely reliant on them, an attempt to maintain the same level of control and authority they had during the child's upbringing. This clinging behaviour, while well in tension, can lead to conflicts and discord within the family dynamic. When parents hold on too tightly to their roles, as they were defined during their children's early years, it can create tension and conflict in the parent-child relationship. The child may feel suffocated, as though they're not trusted to make their own decisions. This can lead to resentment and even rebellion as the child strives to assert their independence. On the other hand, parents may experience frustration and disappointment if their child doesn't conform to their expectations, causing a breakdown in communication and understanding For the child. This discord can hamper their personal growth and ability to establish their identity. They may feel unable to explore their interests or pursue their own passions if they are constantly weighed down by their parents' expectations and judgments. Similarly, parents who cling to their traditional roles may miss out on opportunities for personal growth and fulfilment outside of their parenting role. To maintain a healthy parent-child relationship and foster individual growth, parents must learn to embrace evolving relationship roles. Here are some essential steps to navigate this transition. Firstly, we've got communication. Open and honest communication is crucial. Parents should talk to their children about their expectations, fears and concerns. Likewise, children should express their needs and desires respectfully to their parents. Next, we've got supportive versus controlling. Shift from a controlling parenting style to a supportive one. Provide guidance when needed, but allow the child to make their own decisions and learn from their experiences. Next, we have established boundaries. Both parents and children need to set boundaries for their interactions and personal lives. This allows each party to respect each other's space and autonomy. Next, encourage independence. Encourage your child to take on responsibilities, make decisions and face challenges, celebrate their achievements and offer support during setbacks. Next, we have pursue personal interests. Parents should embrace their own personal interests and hobbies beyond the parenting role. This not only enriches their lives, but also sets an example for their children to follow. As children go up, the parent-child relationship must adapt to changing dynamics. When parents hold on too tightly to their roles as they were defined during the children's early years, discord can arise, impeding the healthy development of both parents and children. Embracing evolving relationship roles, fostering open communication and encouraging independence are essential steps in maintaining a strong and supportive parent-child relationship, and one that allows each individual to thrive and grow into their best selves. Remember, you've got this Until tomorrow.